Music as a Weapon

There are many tools available to the Aspie in his or her battle against anxiety; we are not just limited to medication when it comes to defending ourselves. I have already (if briefly) described how to use mindfulness, as well as CBT and touched upon some useful herbal remedies. However, you cannot have too many methods for combating stress and anxiety and with that in mind I will introduce another of my personal favourites. Anchoring is a neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) technique where an individual associates a mental state with a specific stimulus. That stimulus can be anything, such as a smell, image, sound or even a physical sensation, for example a pinprick. NLP seems to be derived from the behavioural branch of psychology, which is also the simplest, albeit with a lot of over-complicated words and phrases. 

A lot of websites that offer to reduce anxiety (for a fee) use NLP and anchoring in particular as the basis of their service. However, you don’t have to pay a supposed expert to teach you anchoring; it is easy enough to master on your own. Before I was even aware of anchoring and NLP, I had already developed my own form. I use all sorts of stimuli to anchor to a state of calm, but media, and music in particular are the most effective in my opinion. Music is designed to elicit an emotional response in the listener. Have you ever listened to a piece of classical music and felt like your very soul was being gently caressed, or heard a piece of heavy metal and experienced the pain and anger woven into it. Everyone has a song that reminds them of a particular moment in time; if you do then you have already experienced anchoring (albeit sub-consciously). 

The simplest way to anchor a feeling of calm to a song is to pick a song that is suitable to that emotion (so heavy and thrash metal are out) and every time you are feeling mellow, whack it on. To speed this process up, sit in a darkened room, with a mug of camomile tea, listening through some big headphones so that the rest of the world is blocked from your mind; or even whilst meditating. Eventually you will notice that you can play it when you are stressed and it will instantly bring back that mellow. It takes time to build up an extensive library of songs, but it is behavioural psychology at its simplest. It depends upon what kind of music you like, but I would recommend chilled electronic as I find its repetitive nature very comforting. Artists such as Solar Fields, Asura, Aes Dana and I Awake are a good place to start in this respect. 

Once you have gotten anchoring music to calm down to a T, you can start applying the technique to other forms of media like movies or games. After that, the world of anchoring is yours to command.

An Aspie Abroad

It has been bad enough not being able to post due to a lack of time, but for the next three weeks I will not be able to post at all. I am finally going on holiday, having got extra time off due to my extra hard work over the last two months. But wait I hear you say, haven’t I continually stated my dislike/phobia of travel? Well, yes, that is true. However, the place that I am going to in the Mediterranean has a very special place in my heart, and I also have a soft spot for the Mediterranean as a whole. Plus, my entire family are taking time off from work/university to go, so I will have lots of moral support. The flights still scare me though. I wouldn’t say that I have a fear of flying; I just experience a lot of unease when taking off and landing. Which seems perfectly natural, to be honest. I don’t completely understand the physics of flight and that moment when the pilot puts it into full throttle just before take-off just feels wrong. Despite it usually being an early morning flight, my brother and I usually have a breakfast Guinness before the flight (it’s medicinal! On a side note Guinness seems to taste really good early in the morning, I think it’s something to do with your taste buds and them not really being fully awake. I am not an alcoholic, honest, it’s an annual tradition). I also take a valerian capsule before I leave home which seems to suppress the nervous system and take the edge off of my anxieties.

Packing always seems to make me feel more anxious. I guess that that is because it makes it real instead of an idea. When the car pulls away from home I always get the feeling that I’ll never see home again. That for me is the worst part. If I am going to have a panic attack, it is usually then that it happens. Thankfully though, if I am going somewhere that I actually like, then it’s not so bad. Once I am at the airport a sort of acceptance of the inevitable sinks in. My siblings usually provide a good distraction as they know how I feel about the whole thing. When I am there my world shrinks to my immediate surroundings, which is great. I am actually looking forward to having time to read and sleep! Before all of this can take place I have to go to my cousin’s wedding and the party, which is not what I’d call my idea of fun. The actual ceremony will be fine; I just hate fancy dinners. Being an Aspie I find dinner conversation really difficult, not to mention tiring. I think that I will try a new technique to combat the possibility of a panic attack and the resulting nausea: a concoction of cinnamon, ginger and beer. All three are known for their anti-nausea properties, so trying them all at once should be very effective (that is if the concoction doesn’t actually make me sick). I’ll report how it turns out when I get back.

Stress, anxiety and the swear

A while back I wrote a piece on my favourite methods for dealing with anxiety and I ended it by stating that I would post any other ones that came to mind. After stubbing my toe yesterday and issuing a string of highly articulate and inventive profanities that would have made a sailor blush, it finally dawned upon me that I actually felt much better for doing so. It also got me thinking about the times when I have been highly stressed or anxious and whether or not swearing (in private I might add), helped me to deal with the situation. I can remember repeating a certain word (that rhymes with bit) whilst hurtling down a black run on a pair of skis, certain that at any moment something would give and I would soon resemble a giant rolling ball of snow. I didn’t in the end, but my chant, rather perversely, gave me a sense of control and focus. I have lost count of the times when that particular chant has helped me through a difficult situation.

On a psychological level, swearing gives us a sense of control when we have none. When everything else is going down the pan, we can still decide what comes out of our mouth. It almost seems to provide a release for the pent up pain and suffering. Saying socially unacceptable words expresses anguish far more eloquently than any poet ever could. In making it known, the pain somehow lessens. I would never suggest screaming obscenities at the top of your lungs whilst in the middle of a crowded mall. That would most likely end up with you being unceremoniously stuffed into the back of a police car whilst a group of elderly ladies give a series of disapproving looks. If you internalise the dialogue, then you can avoid this particular outcome. Shouting offensive language in your head can work wonders in times of great stress. Points are scored for ingenuity as it will help to take your mind of the cause of your problems. Have fun with it.