A Social Experiment (sort of...)

A couple of months ago I did the previously unthinkable (for me) and finally joined twitter. My initial reasoning was to gain access to another service that required a twitter account. I planned to barely use it. However, as the weeks have gone on I have found myself using it more and more to follow interesting people and organisations. I had no idea that one of my personal heroes, Richard Wiseman would be on there (@RichardWiseman) and naturally he got a follow; as did Bear Grylls (@BearGrylls)

Straight after signing up I was terrified that I would be dragged into new social situations and whilst I still have no doubt that that would be possible, I have kept a fairly low profile. I didn’t tweet for the first few weeks, and then slowly tweeted a bit more as time went on. My profile, initially non-descript has been updated slowly and cautiously, though I will never give my full name.

 I will never be a fully-fledged tweeter, but it has been and continues to be an important social experiment for me. I am in control of how much I metaphorically dip my toe into the pool. When I feel threatened by sudden social advances I can withdraw. I am learning some useful lessons. I have followers and follow people who I correspond with fairly regularly. It gives me the chance to learn about other cultures without the need for anxiety inducing travel or awkward face to face conversations. I use my phone for something other than emergency calls or browsing the web.

Most people wouldn’t see this as a huge change, but for me it has been fairly significant. If it had occurred in 24 hours, it would have caused me a nervous breakdown. But as it has been a slow and steady change over months, it has been manageable. This all confirms my theory that changes in my life are best made slowly and carefully. Oh and I am still never, ever joining Facebook. That is a promise. 

An Aspie in the Social Revolution

The advent of the internet has been a mixed blessing for me, as has the advancement of mobile phone technology. On the one side I have access to more information than I could possibly absorb in a single lifetime, as well as gadgets and tools which my father’s generation would have thought impossible. On the other is the increasing encroachment of social networking as well as the erosion of privacy. Being an Aspie, socialising is not something I am particularly fond of. With face to face meetings I can choose whether or not to engage others. If I don’t want to socialise with that person I can show it through body language (which I have had to learn and I am proud to be better at it than your average male), acting coolly towards them (makes me seem like a total b@$£@rd, so is a last resort) or evade them completely which is the preferable option. The latter is becoming increasingly hard to do, what with things like mobiles and Facebook permeating into our lives.

I have something of a love/hate relationship with my mobile. I use it for emergencies, work related contacts and for communication with my family. Actually, it is a camera first, phone second. I prefer texting to calling as it gives me time to formulate a reply and ensure that I have fully understood what has been said as well as any hidden meanings or sarcasm; something that as an Aspie I struggle with. I do however love my phone as a gadget (and indeed gadgets in general, which I think that I inherited from my dad). Having everything short of a fusion reactor in pocket size is immensely helpful (I am still waiting for a Swiss Army phone with tooth pick, knife, corkscrew and bottle opener!). I never give out my phone number to anyone not closely linked with family or work and it gives me a panic attack when people ask. It’s the same when people ask if I’m on Facebook. To me that suggests a change in the relationship and change, as I have stated before is something that I find about as appealing as a pocket full of live eels. I refuse point blank to be on Facebook, despite the best efforts of my siblings. They think that they’re helping me but it would be a disaster. I have met far too many people that I never wish to see or hear from again to expose myself like that. Every time I have a nervous breakdown I have to disappear from view so that I can recover. Facebook would ruin that. I am also not the same person I was even five years ago. Before that I tried to hide my differences behind an act. People from before then believe that act was the real me. So communicating with people from before then causes me great discomfort and I go to great lengths to avoid them. The past is the past, and that past was terrible for me. I don’t want to go back, and to embrace the Social revolution would be to go back to those times. I am much happier looking in from the outside.